Deborah Frank's Obituary
To encapsulate the life of a strong, bright woman such as Deborah Frank in just a few short words seems somehow inadequate. That is the reason why Debby has all of you, to preserve her legacy and the best of her many qualities, so that her name and memory lives on in the life of the family. Deborah Frank's life was long and not long enough. In her seventy-seven years on this earth, Debby could have been anything she wanted. Instead, used her skills to find the best in everyone she loved- a theme that appears throughout her life. Debby was the born to her parents Raye and Norman Budd in Leeds, Yorkshire, England on February 25, 1945, 2 years years later Harvey entered the picture and the family of four was full. As a kid, Debby was independent and self-sufficient, a trait she learned from her mother. She developed a sense of adventure, fearlessness, and an insatiable appetite for leaming. Having lived in more than a dozen places, included three countries, England, Australia, and the United States, before reaching adulthood, Debby was use to starting over and to making a home no matter where she was or with whom she lived.
Debby was tough, and she was honest. She was assertive and knew right from wrong. She didn't take crap from anyone and always fought for what was right and for those whom she loved: for her late-husband Bill and their marriage of 43 years, and for her flve children: Cassandra, David, Rebecca, Nick, and Sam. She fought for them to live healthy, long lives. Even when she struggled with her own health. She foucht to ensure that each one of them had the opportunity to learn what they needed to make their way in the world. Even when leaming for her was comparatively easy. She was an optimist who, despite having high expectations for herself and everyone around her, never stopped trying to make the best of anything, anyone, or anytime. Despite severe back and leg pain from childhood injuries, she never stopped. Even until last week, she insisted on continuing physical therapy because she wanted to walk again.
Debby's life very much resembles the classic hero's tale she would have recognized well from the fiction novels she loved to read. She was not born in extraordinary cireumstances nor with a silver spoon in her mouth. She earned every breath of life she took through blood, sweat, and tears. She experienced setbacks, financial and medical, but as with all heroes, she rose to meet the challenges she confronted in life with the help of her family, especially these last ten years living with Rebecca. No hero is perfect. In fact, what makes the hero of the story so impressive are their achievements despite their flaws. Debby was every bit the protagonist in the story of her life. She did not let the vicissitudes of her life dictate her fate. Passive is never a word you would use to describe Deborah Frank. She was active, engaged, and shaap. And Debbie instilled these same positive attributes in her children and grandchildren.
The best words our tradition to describe Debby are from the Book of Proverbs in the Tanach. We typically call this text Eshet Chayil, a woman of valor. I added a bit of my own creative translation as well.
(10) Who can find a woman for valor? For her value is far above rubies or precious metals. (11) Her husband safely trusts his heart in her. (12) She does good by him and not evil all the days of her life. (13) She seeks out opportunity, and works willingly with her hands. (14) She is like a merchant ships bringing good home to port; she brings the world to her families table. (15) She rises also while it is still night, and gives food to her household, and to those who help her. (16) She has a mind for business; With the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard. (17) She has a strong gut, and strong arms too. (18) She sees the best of all that is in her possession; Her lamp does not go out by night. (20) She stretches out her hand to the poor; she reaches forth her hands to the needy. (21) She is not afraid of the snow for her household; For all her household are dressed for the season. (25) Strength and dignity are her clothing; And she laughs at the time to come. (26) She opens her mouth with wisdom; and the law of kindness is on her tongue. (27) She looks well to the ways of her household, And eats not the bread of idleness. (28) Her children rise up, and call her blessed; Her husband also, and he praises her: (29) 'Many woman have done valiantly, But you rise above them all.' (30) Grace is deceitful, and beauty is vain; But a woman that is in awe of God, she shall be praised. (31 ) Give her of the fruit of her hands; And let her works praise her in the gates.
What’s your fondest memory of Deborah?
What’s a lesson you learned from Deborah?
Share a story where Deborah's kindness touched your heart.
Describe a day with Deborah you’ll never forget.
How did Deborah make you smile?